Glacial Perspective

Sometimes we feel confined. Sometimes we feel trapped. For thousands of years we wait in suspension to be set free. We wait for the moment when we will drop into the beautiful silty water.  We have been forged together so tightly we have forgotten what being alone means; yet we yearn for it.

We have learned to describe our independence, but only in relation to the thick ice blocks and crevices with which we envelope. What is freedom when we have only our frozen bonds and iced seals to define it? Is the end or the beginning in sight? Life outside the icicles we cling to is drawing near. We have been trapped inside this glacier for so long that we have forgotten the solitary lifestyle. Will we ever be fully alone?  Will the feeling of separateness ever occur? Will we be alone when we melt away from our gelid empire and fall into the murky lake strewn with our ancestors? Even then, although we are no longer frozen to our arctic mother, will we ever be fully free?

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Years have come and gone and we have upheld our duties. We have carved valleys through rigid, unrelenting rock. We have created complex rivers and streams. These system intertwining to create some of the most sensational and breathtaking views. But even through our grandeur we have been trapped. As we grind past one another we have never been alone.

Time is melting away. We await this moment with respect. Although we will no longer be a part of such a magical occurrence, we are thrilled to experience the independent life. Free from the conformities that freeze us together. As the sun beams down, I watch in awe as my family thaws and floats down into the glacial lake below. I know my journey to freedom is about to begin.

I feel my bonds growing weaker. As the thick ice defrosts I know this is the end of my quest. The sun penetrates my home and I welcome the shattered ice fragments with hope. I gleam down at the lake. Millions of tiny diamonds are floating vivaciously on the surface. The soft wind is blowing peacefully. My eyes have never seen the current this clearly. Soon I will be free. Soon I will be alone.

The ice cracks and my ears ring. I feel the jolt surge through my watery exterior. Ripples of excitement radiate throughout my see-through body. For a moment, I am suspended in free fall. Then I begin the glorious decent away from my home. The freedom is remarkable and I feel immortal; maybe we are immortal.

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 As my speed picks up, my shape begins to evolve. I have never felt so alive. I have been confined to the cold hard tethers that had identified me as a glacier for thousands of years. Now, in this moment, I am reduced to one single drop of water. I am free. As I near the lake I am struck with a thought… even in our freedom we are not alone, for we have always belonged to something bigger.

I have waited centuries to experience life ungaccompanied by others. But, in this moment, I begin to see that we are never truly isolated. It is possible to be free from the constraints of our world, but we will always be a part of more than we can fathom.

The faster I fall toward the bright blue water, the clearer it becomes. Millions of isolated drops make up my mother, the glacier. And even in this moment of solitude, I will soon become a part of the lake, then the river, and eventually the ocean. My life is one series of events moving circularly in collaboration with everything around me. This moment of freedom is enlightening on many plains. I begin to understand that freedom is not only a place in time, but also a space of clarity within oneself.

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I am not trapped and I never was. My life was not ending,because in a sense, it never began. Just like the countless of other droplets below me, I belong to something bigger than myself, I belong to the universe. Even though my shape may change and I take on new forms, I will forever be a part of something much more vast than a glacier, lake, or ocean. As I fall freely from the glacier I understand the world cycles through andI will soon become one with the sea. In this moment I am separate, but I know that in my solitude I simultaneously belong to everything around me. In my quest for freedom I am able to remember that independence relies on others to be dependent. I will memorize this feeling forever.

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9 thoughts on “Glacial Perspective

    • Thank you Sonnolenta! This is one of my favorite writings that I’ve posted for the public. It makes my heart sing to know you truly appreciate the words in this post! I wish you all the best and send my love and support! : )

      • It really tugged at my heart. I lost my Father 5 years ago, and my Mother gave me his ashes- she didn’t want them because he had taken his own life. I kept them in the urn for about a year, after which I walked down to the beach on a full moon, and scattered them into the water. I moved away from there a few years ago, but every time I am out hiking, I imagine that he mixed with the sea water, evaporated into the air, condensed into the clouds and fell as rain onto the mountains I stand on. He is part of everything, an eternal cycle. I was just telling my Son this the other day. Then today you liked a post on my blog and this was one of the first posts I read, and you explained it so beautifully, so poetically, I just had a huge sob. Thank you.

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